Don’t Panic!

BG_Adams_MoreThan(Here’s the Black Gate post from July 4)

As I mentioned in my prior post here, I wrote about the Dirk Gently miniseries a couple of weeks ago over at BlackGate.com. This coming Monday (July 4), it’s more Douglas Adams as I do a double-length post on his works. And I had an absolute blast writing it. I plugged it in a FB post today that included the word codswalloping (which was an insult used in a review of the second radio series). So, here’s a never before seen entry from the Guide:

Hitchhiker’s Guide To the Galaxy Entry: “codswalloping” – ‘consisting of utter nonsense’

The term is believed to be attributable to the people of Rankarella, a small planet in the third system of the NeoNorin galaxy.

The Rankarellans were known (to the extent they were known for anything at all) for slapping people in the face with a fish as a greeting. So, imagine a secretary saying “Cup of coffee, Mister Humthroat?” as her boss arrives in the morning. At which point he hits her with a fish.

There are no codfish on Rankarella, which makes that particular word, well, codswallow. There are no Babel fish, either. See also: Babel Fish: Rankarella.

Babel Fish: Rankarella – There are no Babel fish anywhere on the planet. So, visitors from off-planet, who might enjoy the taste of fish, were less than pleased when, having arrived at the spaceport and asked, “Excuse me, where is the nearest restroom?” they end up feeling a fish with their face and are completely unable to communicate with the person who just hit them with said fish. Possibly repeatedly.

This combination of codswallowing and a lack of Babel Fish has led to many wars with other planets. In fact, it’s amazing that the rest of the galaxy hasn’t exterminated the Rankarellans.

Oh, bugger it: maybe a Vogon Constructor Fleet will take care of the whole codswallowing nonsense. Where can I get a PanGalactic Gargleblaster around here, anyways?

Editor’s Note – That last line was the last entry by that particular Guide researcher.

 

 

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